A Streetcar Named FML

instead of really drawn out stories of the crazy poop that goes on in the burg, i'm going to do this blurb style. i've been gathering material for weeks now, so there's really no other option.

get it together, tdu:
you know an event is successful when 5 people come to it.
or it could be that the event is sponsoring something completely mythical, such as domestic violence.
all attendees were members of earth club.
note-oriety is supposed to sing some man-hating songs and whatnot, but we have to wait for one other act.
said act is a two person metal band. guy 1: quite possibly a close relative of JMU's resident homeless person. or one in the same. with an acoustic guitar somehow made into something louder. guy 2: younger dude screaming "free your mind."

his instrument was banging his head on the piano and screaming into a drumset, but not actually playing it. sorry the pictures of him were all blurry because he was thrashing.

midi files in the background?
please, if you know these guys, get me their e-mail or something. i truly would like to market their absurdity. watching notegirls' reactions was beyond amusing.

midsummernote's dream:
i labeled my mom's seat as "leopard lover." in duct tape. she stuck it on her purse and i think it's still there.
in other news, i was at my mom and greg's last night and there is a lifesize picture of me on the wall.
these are the types of things you warn people about?

mike's:
picking up keg for note's after party. standing playing nosey with joe, the usual. this girl is staring at us and starts telling me to watch out. i'm like "oh, that guy in there buying the keg is 21, thanks though!"
she was talking about joe.
she thought i was drunk and joe was trying to hit it.
i guess if you don't know us, things could be perceived that way. but i've never though of it, because everyone knows me and joe. or at least one of us. which explains pretty much everything.
joe and i get in the car to wait because it is cold, and this guy comes out of mike's. we think he's about to light up, but instead he does an elaborate interpretive dance portraying the act of smoking. either that or he was literally just grooving for a good twenty minutes. we took turns wearing my sunglasses so we could laugh at this clown. one of the funniest things i've ever seen -video soon to be on youtube, joe?

but even better, i saw him the next week at mr. j's with a scarf wrapped around each of his limbs and his head. no dancing though.


william:
at kline's part deux (the cold time), brittany showed up with bryce and this guy william. i'm pretty sure no one knew william except for maybe bryce, but bryce is friendly enough that this could be false. he's just kinda chillin with us, introducing himself to everyone and not eating ice cream. then he says something about going to ladies' night at the roller rink and unbuttons his jacket to reveal a sequinned dress.

yup.
it is at this moment that i have deja vu...and remember that i've met him before.
at dhall, josh was asking really loud and inappropriate questions about female hygiene. the people behind us are obviously eavesdropping, so we combine tables. one of these people is william. he asks us these questions:
"if you were a canned good, what would you be?"
and
"if you were a bridge, what kind would you be and between what objects?"
his answer was a hug between two strangers meeting for the first time.
this now does not surprise me in the slightest seeing as how the only interactions i've witnessed from him are with strangers.
he then proceeded to ask a straight-up biddie if she was "done with that" on her way to the tray return.
she ignored him.
he followed her to the tray return and took her plate off of it.
william's tight.

natty is the classiest beverage around:
david found this unopened on a car in prun, so obviously he drank it.
this started poorly.

thank you, jmu, and goodnight.