Photo Gems

Starry Night, anyone? This is someone's hair.

Yes. What you are looking at is a poster hung in my office building. And another yes, what you see displayed here are used condoms and cigarettes. My boss demanded it get taken down (so our customers aren't scared off), and now it hangs proudly in my cubicle. I hope the doorman was the culprit.

Life Unexpected

Today I was inspired to write a blog by a complete stranger. The biddiewatch hiatus might be coming to an end!

I'm currently on the Bolt Bus to NYCitay to spend New Year's and an indefinite amount of time after that (insert standard doubts of returning to college from the best place on earth here). I came very close to not making it on the bus after a coffee date with Tracey and her wonderful asian friend, JP. Being asian is a key point.

They escorted me to the bus at Union Station in DC, and left me to stand in line in Bolt to NY...which I was. I would have stood in that line a WHILE because it wasn't for the bus I needed to get, which left about 1 minute after I got on it.

Seeing as how I was the last to get on board, there weren't really any seats left...except for one next to a cute boy my age, so naturally I asked if I could sit down. He politely moved his strategically placed "don't-sit-here" backpack in the spare seat, and I put my stuff down.

He had headphones in, and I was on the phone, so we are awkwardly ignoring each other. Until the bus driver started saying some words, and I made a joke about how the website told us we were being dropped off at a Sbarro ("the best pizza joint in NY", to quote my friend Brian). He introduced himself! Phew, we are on speaking terms.

As luck would have it, my new friend and coincidental seatmate is a Music Theater major at Elon, where I was a cointoss away from being a student. We start nerding out about music, Tituss Birgus, Miranda Sings, shows in NY, and Florence and the Machine.

Not only that, but he is friends with multiple people in my life, including Connor Smith (shout out)! Now we are FB friends so the world can know our love story. He himself wrote a blog about the small world we live in, so I decided to give my take :)

See his blog here!

Meanwhile, the guy across from us is writing in a spiral bound notebook about fairy zebras in a pumpkin patch with rhyming names...welcome to the city-to-city transport system.

Phrases That Never Quite Made It

"Your face is like music to my eyes."

"That guy's motorcycle is so badbutt!"

"Just joshin' ya."

Kinney For President

Well, after the most boring 6 weeks of my entire existence, I finally have something to say.

Vote for me.

(Actual sign seen in Georgia by my mother)

My platform:

- Shoes

- Pro-humans

- Pro-plants

- Pro-animals

- Peace and other things, like, such as

- Everything for free!

Campaign slogan:

"When the tough get going, I'm gonna need GPS on my phone to follow them."

Family Bonding

Nothing says "functional family" like buying hot dogs in bulk at the Costco cafeteria and then eating them on a display table in the furniture section next to the massive cartons of spring water. They even bothered to get shopping carts to pose as valuable customers.

"This is almost like having a real dining room, Mommy!"

Also featuring my hair.

TINO

And now huggies brings us jeans, encouraging pedophiles everywhere to disregard boundaries. Note that they are for a limited time only.

What My Brain Tells Me

The dreams I have when I go to bed at 5 in the morning, after a night of whiskey, vodka...and pickle juice.

The dream began with me still at the bar. Naturally, the bar was pretty empty considering bars close an hour before this dream began. My roommate "forced" me to drink whiskey. A lot of whiskey. In the basement of the bar, there was this weird bed that was actually a shower. Lots of old women were around, and I was wearing cowboy boots which I ruined in the weird bed shower. Oddly, the basement led outside where a wedding was taking place. I commented on how weird this was to a woman standing next to me who had a young daughter. Everyone was dressed like it was the colonial times, and the wedding party wore black hipster clothes with navy blue accessories. (Sarah Smith, what are your thoughts on this being bridesmaid attire?). ALL OF A SUDDEN I was transported to a concert. Felicia was there, and we were both super pissed that Eminem wasn't performing at this concert, even though he wasn't supposed to. In the distance, we could see real dinosaurs that were inflatable. On my way out of the concert, I saw another young girl/mom duo. Maybe it was the same one. We discussed Clifford the dog, and then he immediately ran by at lightning speed behind the little girl's back. I chose not to tell her that she had just missed the most important moment of her life.

It must have been the pickle juice.