Twitter is Stupid

More things that are real that shouldn’t be:

I bring you Juicy Juice Brain Development.

http://www.juicyjuice.com/Products/Brain-Development.aspx

"Her brain will triple in size by the time she's two."

a. ?!?!?!

b. apparently only works on female babies...

i sense sexism.

c. THIS IS JUST NOT OKAY. i do not want my child to have an unusually large brain. she will look deformed and may or may not explode at an early age. where are the warnings for this product?

d. what happened to the days where i at LEAST felt safe around juicy juice...is nothing sacred?

e. i seem to remember the wrinkliness of your brain being more important than the size. but i could have fabricated that years ago.

So, I’m channel surfing during commercial break and stop on a CW drama crap-type show.  I’m not really paying attention until all of a sudden they look really scared.  Pan to the elevator.  THERE IS A DEMON INSIDE IT.  A really fake looking, angry demon.  It is tearing apart the elevator.  I am laughing too hard to hear the dialogue, so I’m still really confused.  And impressed.  Because the demon is now climbing up the elevator shaft.  But I wonder...why was he ignoring the two very easy targets only a hallway away?

I had to watch Glee, so I dunno what else happened.  But that’s two solid minutes of quality television for my day.

And now, picture of the week:

I always find that the best place to floss is in the middle of the street.

What I meant is that I always find floss on the middle of the street.

Josh just walked in. “Can I use your oven?”

Hello to you, too.

So I dropped my french class, to popular acclaim and picked up health. Online. So far everything in the syllabus is elsewhere contradicted, so I never know what I’m supposed to be doing. But all of this is entirely made up for by the textbook.

Let me give you a little taste, via the first sentence:

“Interested in improving your health? Concerned about the water you drink, the food you eat, or catching SARS?”

...

Why yes, I am VERY concerned.

My other class is equal mix of dissatisfaction and moments-that-are-worth-it.

The good:

My teacher is rather old and somewhat senile.  He thinks that a “modern-day” example of an inductive reasoning is about pokemon cards.  He was really happy about it.

Also, our syllabus is about “reaching for our dreams, and achieving new goals”. Via math. Which is impossible.

The bad:

Everything we do is boring beyond all get-out.

The ugly:

My teacher has absolutely no idea what he is doing.  One of the most clueless teachers I have ever had.  Today we spent 40 minutes while he dug himself into a hole with an easy problem.  We had to take a break so that he could try to figure it out...again.  I stayed after class to try to understand a hw problem that made no sense AND was based off of something we’ve never learned.  He did not know the answer and spent fifteen minutes reading MY textbook trying to understand any part of what was going on.

My question is: How am I supposed to pass any test? Also, why should I even pass if my teacher can’t do any of these problems? We'll find out tomorrow...

ps - i apologize for the use of capitalization in this post. it's not really my style, but i typed this in word last night...

nerd alert.